Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
