yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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