We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
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