i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
