we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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