i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize