Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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