Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Randomize
