she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
