bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
