the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
