Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
