Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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