i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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