Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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