Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
