Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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