she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
