like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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