On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
