Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
ugly people sure do ruin things
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize