ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize