If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
we're so committed to being not committed
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
