it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
