Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
