im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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