that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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