Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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