i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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