I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
