32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
soo... how was my night?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize