How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
