i was born a porn star she said
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
