If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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