Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
