I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
