So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize