Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
