any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize