last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
