Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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