I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
