Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
