Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize