I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
