You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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