i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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