How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize