didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i don't like sucking hair
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize
