Your dad touched me again.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
