She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
No I am not eating basil off your cock
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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