My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
